My First Crush v.s. My First Love: Part 1

I met my first crush in 2nd grade. He was 1 or 2 years older than but got left back so we were stuck in the same class together all through elementary school. We often argued so it was easy to keep the fact that I liked him a secret. Until 4th grade when I made a mistake and told a friend of mine that had just transferred in that I had a HUGE crush on him. She thought she was doing me a favor by tell him for me cause I was too scarred to. I mean, one, I was already in a relationship with someone and two, I knew full well he wasn't someone I really wanted to date. So why bother telling him, right? The worse part is our whole grade knew by the end of that day. It was so embarrassing. Luckily it was also a Friday and by Monday barely anyone would be talking about it. While I was in 5th grade I still liked him but I did a better job of keeping it an actual secret this time cause thanks to my cousin it was confirmed as just a rumor. At the end of 5th grade he moved to Pennsylvania so I thought we wouldn't see each other again. Long story short I was wrong.

On the other hand, me and my first love knew each other before we were even born. Our mothers have been bestfriends since high school so it was a given that their children were going to know each other. We grew up together and were the same age so of course we ended up being close friends. When we were like 5 or 6 a game of hide and seek somehow ended with us kissing. His older sibling's found us kissing then separated us and told us we shouldn't kiss people on the lips unless we were dating them. So after both of us thought about it for like 2 weeks we decided to date without our parents knowing. Even though we were young we took a chance and dated each other. For the first year we saw each other almost every weekend. Then in the second year our moms kind of got busy so we didn't see each other. Still to my knowledge even though we didn't see each other we were still dating. When we finally saw each other again I was really happy to see him after a such a long time, but to my surprise he didn't even remember we were dating. His older siblings remembered but he didn't. In my mind that meant he didn't want to remember and that hurt my feelings. We ended up telling him so he finally remembered. We ended up dating till the end of that summer cause I didn't like that he forgot about me even though I kept thinking bout him. Then we weren't in contact till some time last year. Which is now causing some problems for me.